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View Full Version : This is what a rejection letter from Michael Jordan looks like


AbraCalabro
10-15-2018, 05:00 AM
I sent a card to MJ through the mail back in the 90s in the hopes of landing an autograph, it was a Fleer card. He (interns at Nike, but I like to pretend it was him) sent this back to me without an autograph, but at least my card was returned. Makes me wonder what would've happened if I had sent an Upper Deck card.

Maybe I should've lied and said I was an orphan...actually, scratch that, I used that story when I approached him in person when I was climbing Mt. Everest and ran into him there of all places, long story short he refused to sign and became furious, then he kicked me in the potato sack and I fell down the mountain, luckily I landed on a guy who had just retired from a life time of work that started out in coal mines and he eventually became the CEO of the mining company...doesn't matter though because when he broke my fall, he was crushed.

This cover photo was taken from the nose bleed section. The photographer that took this photo was called for a Flagrant Foul for being too close and ejected from the stadium where Michael Jordan's goons beat him up, ripped his jacket and gave him a black eye. I heard one of the referees also spit on the photographer, but I can't verify that.
https://c1.staticflickr.com/2/1934/45284370502_be9d67c17a_z.jpg


Looking at the interior, you can see he gives you tips on how to play just as well as he does. However, he leaves out the part that involves being a major cash cow for the NBA, well, primarily for David Stern, who unleashes his army of sycophant referees to create a force field around him and how he landed the lead role of main character in the show called NBA Basketball who is never allowed to lose. Despite all that, I did put these moves to the test and still couldn't dunk at the time, so I don't recommend them at all.
https://c1.staticflickr.com/2/1902/43518684500_6dd7f333a9_b.jpg
Anfernee Hardaway was ejected from the game for not letting Jordan steal the ball and dunk on a fast break.



I think one of these days I'm going to attend his camp so I can use his own moves against him. At his age, I can probably just bully him around and if he cries foul then I'll just push him and threaten to take away his prune juice, he's geriatric at this point so what's he going to do about it?
https://c1.staticflickr.com/2/1961/43518684530_c9c6f68fd0_b.jpg


The pamphlet was mailed back in one of those document mailers, they're just like bubble mailers, same color, except no padding.
https://c1.staticflickr.com/2/1928/31460190468_ebd29828c3_z.jpg

THIS IS NFS - This is one of my cherished childhood memories here and one of my DREAM POSSESSIONS, it is absolutely NOT FOR SALE OR TRADE!!! (Unless, maybe, for the RIGHT PRICE, will also trade for autographed Jordan Exquisites, SPx Jordan autographs, Kobe Exquisites, Lebron Exquisites. Anything else that's super expensive.)

drobfan8
10-15-2018, 05:30 AM
Ha ha.

Farken LOL.

Stop it Abra.

I have Exquisites :)

6celtics33
10-15-2018, 06:27 AM
You forgot the part where they used special balls with magnets in them to make sure all his game winning playoff shots went in

AbraCalabro
10-15-2018, 09:02 AM
Ha ha.

Farken LOL.

Stop it Abra.

I have Exquisites :)

...will consider offers, but you've got to offer STRONG. :cool:

You forgot the part where they used special balls with magnets in them to make sure all his game winning playoff shots went in

Actually, that's been debunked. We now know that many of those game winning shots were CGI. :eek: Believe it!

tjforce
10-15-2018, 09:55 AM
Feel fortunate OP.... when I was a lad I sent Penny Hardaway a letter with a Classic rookie card of his to sign.... and wouldn't ya know it, he sent me back similar marketing material, but kept the damn card, likely for his PC.

Unfortunately for him, the movie "The Craft" had just come out, and I had gotten good at practicing witchcraft.

One revenge spell, and BOOM, those knees gave out and never were the same again.

Wonder if that card was worth it to him?

theLUCKYshow
10-15-2018, 10:57 AM
Lol I would buy a coffee table book of Abracalabra threads and posts.



Sent from my SM-N950U using Tapatalk

eastbayak
10-15-2018, 11:09 AM
When I was young, I hand-wrote a letter to Jerry Rice asking for an autograph. Sent it to the Beckett address. Although he didn’t sign the card itself, they sent me a autographed photo (much better than what I sent over). I was happy as hell!

Of course, not all athletes/staff were as willing. Some (when/if I sent cards) kept my cards too hahaha.

P.S. I also think I wrote to MJ and got something similar (not a pamphlet to his flight school but to something else).

AbraCalabro
10-15-2018, 10:19 PM
Feel fortunate OP.... when I was a lad I sent Penny Hardaway a letter with a Classic rookie card of his to sign.... and wouldn't ya know it, he sent me back similar marketing material, but kept the damn card, likely for his PC.

Unfortunately for him, the movie "The Craft" had just come out, and I had gotten good at practicing witchcraft.

One revenge spell, and BOOM, those knees gave out and never were the same again.

Wonder if that card was worth it to him?

You used a Lil' Penny figure as a voodoo doll, didn't you?

Lol I would buy a coffee table book of Abracalabra threads and posts.



Sent from my SM-N950U using Tapatalk

Best part is all my stories are 100% true.

When I was young, I hand-wrote a letter to Jerry Rice asking for an autograph. Sent it to the Beckett address. Although he didn’t sign the card itself, they sent me a autographed photo (much better than what I sent over). I was happy as hell!

Of course, not all athletes/staff were as willing. Some (when/if I sent cards) kept my cards too hahaha.

P.S. I also think I wrote to MJ and got something similar (not a pamphlet to his flight school but to something else).

Wow, that's quite a return. I knew a kid who sent a letter off to Troy Aikman and he actually got his card back SIGNED. All the kids in the school yard were jealous...well, mostly the football guys, but still it was a big deal back then.

Do you still have the stuff you got back from MJ? (Nike interns.)

GoldPanner
10-15-2018, 11:55 PM
I don’t think I have seen any of your threads before...


But I think I love you

MightyWrighty
10-17-2018, 05:20 PM
Now that is a beautiful inspiration story!!!

MightyWrighty
10-17-2018, 05:21 PM
If you only knew He sent you back something better than an silly auto He sent you a deep personal message